I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
