break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
