I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
