i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize