FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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