btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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