Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Randomize
