its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
