i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
