haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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