CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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