i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
