Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
