Can Purell be used as lube?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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