WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
