Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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