I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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