And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
