Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Randomize
