Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
