the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
