He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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