are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
