You really coming over, don't trick.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
