i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
