im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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