i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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