Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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