You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
