Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
my shit smells like andre
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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