i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
