A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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