let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
