New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
