Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
