Don't you send me to vm
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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