in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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