You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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