When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
