your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
