He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
