names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
