Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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