he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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