YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
