really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
