i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
