am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize