first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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