There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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