you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
